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Nanvaent Help: A bit of history There is a world just around the corner of your mind where reality is an intruder and dreams come true...you may escape into it at will, you need no magic key or Aladdins lamp, just your own imagination and curiosity about the land that never was....Valdar....In the realm of Vaxmud. The story so far In the beginning was darkness, Gandalf saw this was a bad thing and said "Let there be MUD" and there was Mud, and he saw this was a good thing. He then said "Let there be players!" and lo, from the far corners of the campus players crawled forth from the primevial slime. As they approached, Gandalf said "Let there be monsters !!" and Margaret Thatcher crawled forth. Gandalf thought this was a very bad move and tried in vain to destroy the evil being. For days and days they battled and in a desparate attempt to save mudkind, Gandalf unleashed a devastating magic, mutating the Thatcher in the slightly less evil Dardros who ran away and hid in the deepest, darkest depths of the Core. Seeing that he had done a very good thing, Gandalf retired to a cosy little office deep in the bowels of the Royal College. But one dark day a cloud passed across the face of the land in the shape of control and competition. An attacking army from the distant realm of MUDII made a pitiful attempt to usurp Vaxmud. Luckily the attempt failed and once more the Sun (not the newspaper) shone brightly on the land. In the land, two great Wizards arose from the mists of Time, two wizards so powerful that by comparison all others are just mucking about in pointy hats. Their names:
Vaxmud Chapter 7 (The Big Meaty One) Valdar, the land of imagination, the land of heroic adventures, the land of buxom wenches and of course, the land where the pubs never shut. Valdar rotates very slowly upon the backs of six ginormous intergalactic Lemmings which sit upon the back of %&^%#$ the Great from the 12th dimension. (%&^%#$ or ^ to his friends, spent many a decade roaming the multiverse seeking the One Great Treasure. Many hardships did he face, many battles he did fight but in the end he was triumphant! The treasure was his! But the gods were not ammused (and why should they be) and as punishment for his dasdardly crimes they embedded the One Great Treasure in a lump of rock and commanded ^ to carry it for the rest of his natural life (He had drunk the multi-facetted potion of super longlevity on one of his adventures) or till the multiverse ends, which ever comes first. One of the Gods took pity on him and gave him half a dozen Lemmings to keep him company, but it didn't take long for the Lemmings to fall out with ^ since he demanded that they share the load. So till this day ^ still carries the One Great Treasure, embedded in a piece of rock that became known as Valdar. Many have set out to seek the Treasure, few have returned but empty handed.) At this moment in time, well at that moment of time, 'cause the moment of time that is now is already then by the time you read this, ^ was feeling rather depressed. (And Ford and Kurgan are in the Pub.) Meanwhile on Valdar another Great War (War To End All Wars XXVII) was underway. Rumours had reached the citizens of Grudul that the Associated League of Trolls and other Unwanted Underworld Creatures had discovered the One Great Treasure. Not wanting to be usurped by a stone heads the citizens promptly declared war and set about getting the O.G.T. for themselves. It may be of interest to note that Ford & Kurgan were sliding under the table at this point. Many of the Valdarian Wizards joined the war (On their own side) since they could never allow the O.G.T. to fall into the hands of the peasants. High King Ke took severe offence to being called a peasant and promptly beheaded a few dozen Wizards before they could get their wands out of their pockets. Needless to say that Ford & Kurgan and now been joined by Ivor & Maverick with a fresh supply of the golden liquid. The war raged and raged, mountains were split open, seas boiled, Kurgan puked and finally everyone agreed that it had all been a big mistake and that the original message had been that the trolls had found One Good Tory and he infact had been brain dead for the last million years. At about this time the barman rang last orders and Maverick the Knight of Death & Destruction rang his neck and called for more ale and a better terminal which ever was available. So the citizens of Grudul once again rebuilt the city, blocking up the north and south gates and opening the east and west gates to that rumours may travel freely. It may be of interest to note that the few assassins who lived in Grudul were evicted on the grounds of that if they were good assassins they would have been able to kill the rumour at source. The Assassins packed their bags and headed for the quite village of Restinford some miles to the east of Grudul. About this time Ford, Kurgan, Ivor, Strider & Maverick returned form the pub to find the land looking really strange, they put it down to the little slices of Orange in the Southern Comforts..... Those slices of orange don't half give you a hang-over. So once again the land of Valdar was peaceful... ...Until a new wave of adventurers arrived! |
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